Have you ever tried dropping a few subtle gift hints in the lead-up to your birthday or Christmas?  You mention the amazing pair of shoes you tried on or the designer perfume you spritzed and fell in love with.  Now tell me, do the subtle hints work for you?  Or, have you ended up unwrapping a pasta-maker when what you really had your eye on was a soft-as-butter leather purse? (True story.)

When it comes to making your desires a reality, subtle hints just won’t cut it.  You’ve got to know what you want and then be crystal clear in asking for it.

So, you say you want more time.  You want a better balance.  You’d like more time for yourself.  Well, if so, I’m sorry to break it to you but the chances are you might just end up with a pasta maker.  It’s time to get clear on what you really want.

If you want more time, why?  What will more time give you?  What’s really important to you about having more time? Or more money? Or a better balance? Or whatever your surface level wish is.  

Dig a little deeper and you start to get to your core desire/s.

If you were granted your wish of more money, your bank account has just been credited, what would this mean to you?  Would it mean you could quit your job? And then what? Spend time with your family?  Start your own business?  What is the motivation and the core desire that sits beneath your wish.  

Maybe you truly desire love and connection and more money would mean more time to spend with the people you love.

Or quitting your job and starting your own business would give you a sense of achievement and fulfilment.

Or maybe more money means more freedom so you can choose the lifestyle you want to create.  You can travel.  You can choose work you love.

Give it a try.  Think of what you keep wishing for.  Identify your “if… then…” stories.  For example, if I had more time, then I’d be happier/less stressed.  It will probably be a thought that loops around your head frequently.  

Once you’ve pinpointed it, get digging.  Ask yourself, why do I want that?  Keep going until you get to an emotion, then you’ve struck gold.  Most often, you’ll feel like the word resonates, it will feel right.

stop wishingAnd here are two reasons why its super-important to be clear on your core desires and not just your surface level wishes

1. Your core desires are your compass.  When you live in ‘alignment’ to the things you desire the most, things will flow more easily.  If they’re not, then things start to feel a bit ‘off’, they feel more of a struggle.  In a nutshell, you can consciously make choices and decisions to live in a way that suits you and what you value most.

2. There may be ways in which you can bring your desire about in your life right now.  So, if you wish for more money, a lottery win might be unlikely.  BUT, if the reason you wish for a windfall is because your core desire is to feel peace or calm, you can find ways today to create that feeling in your life.  Maybe a quick walk after dinner in the evening would feel calming.  Or a bubble bath.  Or maybe meditation might bring you a feeling of peace.  

Living your desires might just be a little closer than you think.

So, over to you.  I’d love to hear what your wish is and what you’ve identified as your core desire then one simple way you could create that feeling today.

Image source: {1} {2}